Photo from NPR
By Christiana Corporon
Cheslie Kryst had it all on paper. Former Miss USA, attorney, social activist and television correspondent. At only thirty, she had accomplished more than most people ever will in their lifetime. From her enviable sense of fashion, her sparkling smile and that absolutely stunning curly hair, she was everything I wanted to be. I can’t think of a time that Cheslie walked into a room and wasn’t the most accomplished person there. Yet somehow, she always made you feel like you were the most special and important person in the room.
Cheslie Kryst was my friend. I met her through my mother in the Fall of 2019 when they started working together on the entertainment news show, Extra. From then, Cheslie became like the older sister I never had. My mom became her “work mom” as well as one of her best friends. They were together everyday at work and even sometimes on the weekends. I could always count on Cheslie’s weekly FaceTimes whether she just wanted to check in or show me whatever red carpet event she was covering at the time.
I refused to believe her death was a suicide. People wanted answers. “Did you or your mom see any signs? Can you think back to any time she may have hinted towards being suicidal?” No, I didn’t. Because there were no signs. It quickly came to light that Cheslie had been suffering from high-functioning depression.
High functioning depression is exactly what it sounds like: someone suffering from mental illness who outwardly appears to have it all together and doesn’t fit the stereotype of a depressed person who hasn’t left their room in days. The term “high functioning” should not and does not diminish the extent of one’s depression. Someone suffering may be able to mask their emotions for periods of time at work or with friends and family only to have to come face to face with their thoughts at the end of the day. It becomes almost mechanical until one day it’s not anymore. Putting on this persona quickly becomes physically and emotionally exhausting, often too much to bear.
Whether intentional or not, society often contributes to the stigma surrounding depression. Admittedly, I too, at first would not accept that Cheslie’s death was a suicide. Yet following her mother’s statement just a few days later, reality sank in. Despite confirmation of her death, comments flooded her Instagram with messages like “Why would someone like her do such a thing? Did anyone check the cameras?” While it is understandable to be shocked by this kind of tragedy, these comments only perpetuate the idea that someone as successful as Cheslie could not have been so sad given the life she had. Depression doesn’t discriminate. It doesn’t care who you are or how glamorous your life is.
When there are no signs, it’s hard to know how to help. Something as simple as checking in on your “strong” friends every once in a while goes a long way. Check in on your strong friends, your sad friends, your old friends, new friends and maybe even a stranger every once in a while. You never know the impact it could have.
There will never be adequate words to do Cheslie justice. She was a walking gift to everyone fortunate enough to know her. She was taking the world by storm while simultaneously weathering her own storm nobody knew about. Don’t suffer in silence. To help keep Cheslie’s legacy alive, donate here to the Dress for Success Cheslie Kryst Advancement Fund.
